Meant To Be
by x'KatieLouise'x
Summary: The lawyers need to hear the survivors sides to the plane crash. So Mark opens up and tells his love story. Story better than the summary. Slexie. Reviews are more than welcome. Give it a go!


**So I've had this jumping around in my head for a while. There's a few differences from Grey's so just read and hopefully enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: Wish I owned Grey's Anatomy. **

**Meant To Be**

_The room was silent except for the sounds of heavy breathing and the occasional tapping pen. Six surgeons sat on one side of a board room table whilst a woman dressed in a plain black suit stood opposite them; she glanced from one to the other waiting for whoever was going to finally break the silence. _

"_I realise this is hard..." She started, a frown covering her face when one of the surgeons mumbled a 'yeah right' under their breath. "But I need your stories. From start to finish."_

"_I'm sorry, but has it ever crossed your mind that we are unable to talk about it?" The response came from the low voice of Doctor Derek Shepherd, head of Neurology. _

_The woman sighed and bowed her head. "Yes, I know. But we need to know the ins and outs before we can even go ahead any further. Please." She was pleading with them now and yet none wanted to cave under her pressure. _

"_Perhaps we could do this one at a time?" The Chief of Surgery Doctor Owen Hunt suggested as he leant across the table to look at his staff. _

"_No." Callie Torres spoke for them all. "We're all in this." _

_Silence overcame the room again and the woman sat down in exasperation. _

"_How shall I start?" All the Doctors turned to look at the person who was finally willing to tell his story. _

"_From the beginning please Doctor Sloan." The woman immediately pressed record on her tape recorder and placed it into the middle of the table. _

"_And you want everything from my side of the story?" He queried, his eyes boring holes into the mahogany wood of the table. _

"_Yes. Please tell your side of the plane crash you were in last month and how Doctor Lexie Grey lost her life..."_

_Everyone in the room flinched at the mention of her name, their eyes falling downcast. Mark Sloan took a breath and leant back in his chair. "Okay, but first of all. It's not just about how a doctor, one of our own died, it's about Meredith losing her sister, Yang, Derek and Robbins losing a colleague and me...well I lost the woman I loved..."_

"Mark, can you move it already?" Mark was shook out of his reverie by Derek shoving his bag into his back. He walked down the small aisle and half smiled as he caught Lexie's wide eyed gaze. She quickly turned from him and he continued forward before slouching into his seat. "I have to sit against the window again?" Derek sighed as he too took his seat.

"I hate the window seat, you know that." Mark casually glanced behind him to see Lexie had leant back in her chair with her eyes closed, her chest rose from her deep intakes of breath. "She hates flying." He mumbled turning to look forward once again.

"Maybe you should have sat with her then." Derek responded matter of factly. Mark gave him an incredulous look. "Look, you'll have to talk to her about it at some point. The woman opened her heart to you and all you could do was walk away with your girlfriend."

"What else was I supposed to do? It's never worked for us before so why would now make any difference?"

"Because you love her too."

Mark and Derek had said no more on the subject, mainly because Mark knew how right he was. He didn't know how long they'd been flying, all he could think of was the voice in his head controlling his urge to turn around and look at her. Not only was the voice controlling that urge, but it's constant looping of 'you missed your chance, you missed your chance' was beginning to irritate him.

"Shut up," he mumbled to himself. He ignored Derek's look of humour that was thrown his way.

"Did you feel that?" Meredith's voice filled the silent aircraft. Derek turned in his seat to look back at his wife.

"Feel what?"

"I could have sworn..." Meredith was cut off as the plane suddenly dipped before levelling out. Suddenly all the surgeons were alert.

"What was that?!" Mark tried to ignore the sound of sheer panic in Lexie's voice and continue facing ahead of him.

"It's okay, just a bit of turbulence." Derek was smiling reassuringly at her and for that Mark released a breath of relief that someone was trying to calm her nerves. Within a second the plane dipped once more causing Derek's head to collide with the window.

"Oh my god!" Arizona's exclamation caused Mark to look towards where she was staring. His eyes widened and he began fumbling for his seat belt. "The wing's on fire!"

Terror flooded through the small aircraft as everyone started to buckle their seatbelts and question what the hell was happening. Mark's heart rate began to increase as the plane dipped and didn't stop. His hands gripped the arms of his seat turning his fingers white. He didn't know what was going on around him, all he could think was that this was the end, he'd never do another surgery again, he'd never be able to laugh and have a beer with Derek again...he'd never get to tell her he truly loved her...he'd never get to marry and have children with her; with Lexie.

And it was then that her petrified voice broke through his reverie. "It...it won't do up!" He finally turned to look at her; she was looking from the windows and back to her belt again and again. "Come on..." He could see her hands shaking as she tried in vain to get her belt to click in place instead of just breaking apart again. "Please," her eyes had begun to water as they finally met his own.

He would always remember the last look on that plane she had given him, a look of sheer panic had stretched across her beautiful face and he bet his own looked the same. Their eyes locked and he wished he'd been strong enough to not let the last chance he'd had to tell her he loved her slip through his fingers. He wanted her to know that he felt exactly the same way she felt about him so he hoped the look in his eyes was saying it all for him. He finally turned away from her eyes as he began to fiddle with his own seatbelt, Derek must have noticed what he was planning and placed his own hand over Mark's. Was he not hearing Lexie's yells that her belt was not doing up?! He willed the universe to go back in time so that maybe he could convince her to take his seat or better yet, no one get on that doomed flight anyway.

The look on her face would stay with him forever. The fear that made her already doe like eyes even larger, her skin had turned ghostly pale and her hands had locked tightly on her broken belt as the plane continued the escalated descent.

Time seemed to have stopped; he didn't know when or where the inevitable crash of the plane would happen. He wasn't sure if he wanted it to happen quicker or wait a while. They seemed to be falling forever and all he wanted was to be able to reach for her and hold her tightly.

"Brace yourselves!" he heard Derek shout over the commotion. His eyes were still stuck on her; if he was going to die, he was going to die looking at the woman he loved. And within a second he heard the sound of metal tearing. Her eyes widened as the top of the plane above her head flew off into the distance.

"Mark!" she screamed as her chair was torn backwards. They were descending quickly and he glanced away for a second to snap open his belt and when he turned back, the back of the plane wasn't there...Lexie wasn't there.

_The room was silent as Mark took a breath. He refused to look at anyone as he told his side of the harrowing story; he simply fiddled with the pen in his hands. He wondered if what he was doing was slowly killing Meredith. After all, who wants to listen to the story of her sister's death. She was there at the time, she saw it all happen so why would she want to relive the horror? Then the thought crossed his mind, perhaps it was helping her deal with the pain of it all...to know that Lexie did not die in vain and that she was loved like no other. _

"_Doctor Sloan?" He looked up at the woman opposite him and noticed she now looked gaunt and pale. He nodded, sighed and rubbed his temples. _

"_I don't remember waking up; I don't remember anyone's screams or incoherent mumbling. I just remember looking around and realising I couldn't see Lexie anymore..."_

Arizona was screaming apparently. Christina was saying something about losing a shoe. Meredith was yelling for Derek. And Lexie...wasn't there.

"Lexie?" Pain tore through Mark as he tried to stand up from where he guessed he was thrown to when the plane crashed. "Lexie?" He didn't have a clue as to where they were, a humorous thought of being included in the first episode of 'Lost' crossed his mind before real life suddenly kicked in. They were in the middle of nowhere because their plane had crashed.

Their plane had actually crashed.

What are the odds of that? One in a billion?

"Lexie?!" he shouted louder this time as he stumbled forwards trying to regain his balance.

"Mark I don't know..."

"Ssh!" Mark cut Christina off as he listened out for something in the distance. What was that...tapping? "Lex...Lexie!" he shouted as he forced his legs to run off in the direction of the noise.

The sight of her made bile climb up his throat. His Lexie was lying underneath a part of the plane barely breathing...barely alive.

And he couldn't rescue her.

The metal was too heavy to lift and the pain in his chest was getting worse only now he didn't know if it was because he was injured from the crash...or seeing Lexie like this.

Mark lied on the ground opposite her, trying to calm her until Christina could bring back help. Deep down he knew that the help Christina could get wouldn't be enough. Lexie needed emergency services to cut her free and then surgery. Neither would happen here.

"You're okay," he wasn't sure whether he was saying it to convince her or himself.

"Mark."

He ignored her; he knew what she was going to say to him. "Christina's going to be back in a minute and we're gonna get you stabilized. And you're gonna be fine okay?"

"Mark."

"So just a few minutes okay. She'll be back any minute." He could see the light in her eyes dimming but he refused to believe it or let her go.

"Mark, I'm, I'm dying." Her words caused the bile to return in his throat. How is he supposed to go on without her?

"What? No you're not." Maybe if he could just convince himself the statement would be true. Maybe God, if there was a God, would be able to hear his silent prayer of keeping her alive.

"I, I am. Please...tell... tell Meredith that I love her and that she was a good sister. Please tell my dad..." He shook his head. No, she was not allowed to say her goodbyes. He would not say goodbye to her.

"You're not dying. You're gonna be fine." Maybe if she believed it she would be. Why wasn't she fighting hard enough? He couldn't do all the fighting for her himself.

"Hold my hand." Her small hand reached for him, like it had so many times before but this time was different. This time everything was wrong. He willed time to go backwards. He willed the days to go back so he could tell her he loved her just as much as she loved him. How could he have let her go so many times? Why hadn't he fought hard enough for her in the past? Why wasn't he strong enough to lift the airplane now?!

"I'm not holding your hand because you're not dying." Stubborn. He was always so stubborn and he knew that if she was strong enough she'd be rolling her eyes at him right now.

"Hold my hand." Her voice was begging for him. He knew she was scared but he wasn't ready to let her go.

"No you're not dying. Do you hear me? You don't die today." He stood up and tried with all the strength in him to lift the metal crushing her. But he couldn't. He let out a noise that was somewhere between a groan and a scream. Realisation dawned on him. He had no other option...no other chance...no other choice. He had to say goodbye to her. But how do you say goodbye to the person you love? "I love you."

"You don't have to say it just because I said it."

"I do, I love you. I've always been in love with you; I will always be in love with you." Tears were building in his eyes as he gripped onto her hand for dear life. Why was this happening?

"Yeah?" A sudden light beamed from her and for a split second she was the Lexie he knew, no broken bones, no bleeding scrapes and life and love filled eyes.

"Which is why you have to stay alive. We, we, we're gonna get married and you're gonna become an amazing surgeon. And we're gonna have two or three kids."

"Soph, Sophia can have siblings." She was so beautiful to him.

"Yeah, a sister and two brothers. And..." His heart was breaking, falling into a million tiny pieces in his chest. This wasn't happening. This couldn't be happening. "We're gonna be happy Lex. You and me, we're gonna have the best life Lexie, you and me, we're gonna be so happy. So you can't die okay? You can't die. Because we're supposed to end up together. We're meant to be."

"Meant...meant to be."

Tears slid down his cheeks as his hand moved forward and closed her eyes. She was dead. Lexie was dead. The love of his life was dead. They'd had so many chances...and he kept messing it up. And now they had no more chances. She was gone; slipped out of his fingers.

"I love you."

_At some point during his story Callie had taken his hand in her own. He turned to her to see tears sliding down her cheeks and he could feel his own on his cheeks. _

"_Um..." He glanced up to see the woman before him. "Is that all?" She choked on the question but Mark noticed that it wasn't because of his story but because it was something she had to question. _

"_Are you serious?" Mark felt Callie's hand slip from his own as she stood. "Is that...is that all?! Did you not just hear his story? Are you serious?" she asked exasperated. "Look around you, everyone here has been affected by this crash, you realise that right? And I'm not just talking about physically or PTSD, I'm talking about learning how to deal with the loss of a person that is a part of you. Because that's what Lexie Grey is...a part of us. Here at Seattle Grace Mercy West we're a team, a family and we've lost a part of that. And all you can say is, is that all?"_

_The woman shrugged unsure of what to say. "I don't think you need to hear anyone else's side of things." Derek spoke now. The woman nodded as she agreed. "Thank you, let's go." _

_Everyone slowly walked from the room. "I think you made her totally uncomfortable," Christina laughed. _

"_She deserved it." Callie shrugged turning to Mark. "You okay?" _

"_I'm just going to head home." Callie nodded and watched as he walked away. _

_The hospital was quiet tonight and for once no one was stood at the exit. Mark glanced to his right as he walked out of the doors. Five or so metres from the place in which he stood was where Lexie had expressed her feelings to him. He pulled his jacket tighter around him as he leant against the wall. He closed his eyes and it was as if he could see her standing there. _

"I love you, oh god oh my god that just came flying out of my face like some kind of, I, I love you. I did it again. I love you, I do, I just love you. And I have been trying not to say it, I've been trying so hard to mash it down and ignore it and not say it and Jackson is a great guy, he, he is, he is gorgeous and he's younger than you and he doesn't have any grandkids or babies with his lesbian bffs and he's an Avery and he liked me, you know, he really liked me. But it was never going to work out because I, I love you and I am so in love with you. You're in me, it's, it's like you're a disease, it's like I am infected by Mark Sloan. And I just can't- I can't think about anything or anybody and I can't sleep, I can't...breathe, I can't eat. And I love you, I just, I love you, all the time it's just every minute or every day, and I- I- I-I- I love you."

"_You never let a person get a word in edgeways...I love you too Lexie..." Mark opened his tear stained eyes. "I should have told you," his head tilted towards the sky. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before...I'm so sorry Lex. But I'm telling you now, and I'll tell you every day for the rest of my life that I love you. Wait for me Lex...I love you...we're meant to be."_

"Meant to be."


End file.
